Shae's blog: Terrific Three at Happy Watoto

All smiles from both of us!

James finally warmed to pictures.

Before I shut this blog down, I just wanted to share the photos and video I took of James, Jackson, and Pendo on 20 March, 2012.  I was heading back from Moshi after a visit with my lawyer and was passing Kikatiti.  Knowing that I would be leaving Tanzania the next day and having no idea when/if I would return, I decided that I had to stop and sneak a peek at these beautiful three.  

I arrived during lunch time and spotted my beloveds immediately!  Jackson about leaped out of his chair at me, but I convinced him to stay seated and to finish eating. Pendo acknowledged me but never skipped a beat on her chicken and rice.  James, however, was extremely shy and at some point started to cry.  I felt bad because I didn't want to scare him.  I later learned that he was crying for something totally unrelated to me.  But for a short time, I wasn't sure!!

He never stopped being funny throughout the whole visit.

I only stayed for about an hour but it was a great hour none the less.  While James had been initially reserved, he really warmed up by the time I left.  Jackson was all smiles, giggles, and engagement from the moment I arrived.  He wasn't sad when I left, but he did offer hugs and kisses.  It was so cute.  Still, for those of you who know me, I had the most thoughts and feelings on my most cherished love--- Pendo. 

Pendo came into my life in early September, 2010.  I put forth a lot of time, prayer, energy, research, and committment into her care.  Through my time with her getting her well, she taught me so much about love, heartache, hope, and tenacity.  I am a forever changed person because she was a part of my life.  There was no way I could have known, but her illness and triumph over malnutrition prepared me for the diagnosis and treatment I would face with Happy.  I am indebted to Pendo-- and she may never know.  Pendo has one physical scar on her head from the damage of the malnutrition.  The skin tore away from her head and took hair follicles with it preventing hair to grow back.  But at my visit with her on the 20th, I noticed that the scar is getting smaller.  SMALLER.  Remarkable.  

Such beauty behind those eyes!

Pendo has endured so much in the 2+ years that I have known her.  She was abandoned by her mother by being left at Cradle of Love.  She fought malnutrition, TB, and the effects of being HIV +.  But somehow, she overcame!  Then when she aged out of Cradle, she was moved to Happy Watoto.  She was angry and quiet as the wounds of previous abandonment made their way to her emotional surface.  She acted like a child betrayed.  And in a sense, she was!  We got her better at Cradle of Love to return her to her mother.  But that would never come to be.  And now her life will be hard and consist of orphanage placement after placement until she is too old to live in an orphanage anymore.  My heart breaks thinking about it.  And I worry for her.  Except that on this past visit, I saw a spark in her again that had been gone for some time.  And I noticed that the scar on the side of her head was getting smaller.  Maybe that outward physical scar was the metaphor for the healing that is being done for her emotional and mental development.  I love Pendo.  I will always love her.  And I will always worry about her-- for the rest of our lives.  But I think that the broken, abandoned, shell of a little girl is growing into a strong, resilient citizen.  The smiles that she gave me last week --those beautiful beautiful smiles that even gave way to small sparkles in her eyes-- give me hope that she will be ok.  And hopefully, there will always be people visiting who can give me updates on her life.  I love her.  And I don't ever want to lose contact with her progress.

Anika, doesn't your boy look so cute still sucking on that thumb?!?!

Ok, so enjoy the pictures and video.  Future volunteers-- please go visit these three at Happy Watoto and let them know that they are special and so loved!!!!

Jackson wanted to be in every picture.

My life is so much better having had the three of them in it!  They are miracles of mercy and grace.  And their existence reminds me that nomatter the struggle that each of us volunteers go through to get to Tanzania and offer our lives to them, that it was all worth it!  So worth it.  They are worth it.  

~Shae